Ten years on from my letter to 18 year old me: the two things I forgot to say

A few years ago I wrote a letter to my 18 year old self as a guest post for Martin Lee's blog, Fatherleemoments.com. Ten years and a month later I've dug it out again, and there are two things I never told that lad.

When Martin asked me to write something for Fatherleemoments.com I couldn't turn it down. I tried to be honest and get a bit of humour in there, and I was over the moon when it went live. Reading it back a decade on, most of it still stands. Here's the letter as I wrote it, then what I'd add now.

Dear 18 year old me,

There's a number of things I'd like to tell you but first let me explain that you have a very happy, healthy and lovely family. But you live in Wigan! Yes Wigan! Who would have ever thought it. It's further north than Watford Gap, I know. Also learn to drive earlier, it's so much more fun and watch out for cars on the Bushey roundabout

Practice your signature because it's gonna stay with you for a few years and there's a couple of embarrassing moments when you can't nail it!

Buy stocks in Apple. Please

Unfortunately your hero and grandfather Tom passes away in the near future. Take every moment you have with him, relish his knowledge and understand that despite his lack of visible emotion, he's very proud of you.

Life will throw you a curve ball in your career. You'll become an exceptional golfer and turn professional at 19 but injury will force you to stop a few years later. Life isn't over and the skills that you learn such as dealing with people, taking a lead on life, instructing others and being competitive stand you in good stead.

Friends come and go. You're a great judge of character and those that don't come along with you on the journey that is life, you won't miss. However those that do are your brothers and would do anything for you. Cherish those friends and the time you have together.

You'll be a great dad to two gorgeous girls. You'll be their rock and despite not having a dad yourself, you'll know what to do, don't worry.

You'll meet the love of your life in a random place but you'll just know. Your wedding day will be exceptional. Life will never be the same after that moment and whatever challenges come your way, you'll overcome them together.

Top tip for life, fully experience everything life throws at you and don't regret a thing

Whatever you do,

Don't stop being you. It's what led you to where you are now and the future you wouldn't change that for the world.

Regards

The Future You.

P.s, love the Henry years at Arsenal, it'll be a few years before you'll experience beautiful football like that again.

What I'd add today

Two things, and I'm annoyed I missed the first one.

I told that 18 year old he'd be a great dad to two gorgeous girls. I never said is how much I love being a dad. Not the job title, the actual thing. The school runs, the bedtime books, the arguments about shoes. And it didn't stop at two: we end up with three children. It is the most fulfilling thing I've done, more than turning pro at 19, more than anything at work. If I'd known how good it would feel I'd have put it at the top of the letter, above Wigan and the Apple shares.

The second is shorter. Don't trust people in shiny cars without genuine personalities. You're a good judge of character, I said so in 2016, but a flash motor can still buy a few months of benefit of the doubt. It shouldn't. Look at how they treat people who can't do anything for them, then decide.

Everything else I'd leave alone. Still miss Grandad Tom. Still can't nail the signature every time. Though some success has returned to the Emirates.

If you've never written your own letter, sit down and do it. Then put it in a drawer and read it in ten years. Mine was worth the wait.